I'm a Satellite Heart, Lost in the Dark

Two Days until this:

Yeah, I am pretty excited.

I Will Face the World Alone and Never be Lonely

Farewell February! I probably won't miss you. March means spring is coming!

This weekend I headed down to St. George to spend some time with my mom, grandma, and great aunt. It was educational. There were so many conversations about body parts and body functions, I never want to get old. But it was a very good trip and I am glad the girls were going to vegas so I could catch a ride with them. We left on Thursday evening and now it is sunday afternoon and I am waiting for them to come get me.

The weekend mostly consisted of me babysitting/chauffeuring my grandma and great aunt around while my mom was at her conference. We went to Michaels (multiple times), target, costco, wal-mart, The St. George Temple, Cracker Barrel, In-and-Out, Croshaw's (Pie shop), A random fabric store, and Jacob Hamblin's home.

I also helped my great aunt make some fleece tie quilts while we watched Enchanted. It was a great weekend, but I feel like I need another weekend to recuperate. Those woman kept me up late most nights and they wake up impossibly early. Great Aunt Millie is hilarious and the sweetest little lady you have ever met. I hope there will be many more trips down to visit her.

Now some pictures for your viewing pleasure:

My new favorite missionary couple. They were leading tours at Jacob Hamblin's home

A skull in Jacob Hamblin's home

The ladies I spent the weekend with

My ever so stylish Great-Aunt Millie

things happen, I know, for a reason

As of late life has been crazy. I have been so stressed and I don't know what to do about anything. It is awesome. I have my first really hard test for work coming up and I am terrified. School projects are piling up and it seems as though I will never have the time to finish them all. I have friends but I feel very alone right now. I need a fresh start and a big change. Too bad it is the middle of the semester. Winter semester is always the hardest. I miss the sun, the warmth on my skin, swimming, studying in the grass, getting a little color on my skin.

I was chatting with my friend this weekend and I was trying to have a pity party and he would not let me. I was really mad at the time because I just wanted to complain about everything but after awhile I realized he was right. I have to decide to be happy. No one is going to come along and suddenly make me happy. School is not magically going to become easier. I have to choose to live my life and not just make it through my life. So here are the good things happening in my life:

I went to a concert friday night. I love concerts and this one did not disappoint.

The semester is halfway over on wednesday.

I have money. Not tons, and it is mostly all spoken for, but I have money for the things I need.

I do have friends. They love me, and I need to appreciate them more.

I have some amazing roommates, one of which in particular who takes very good care of me.

I have a place to live for S/S/F/W. And for less than I was expecting.

I am getting a new nephew in May.

I get to make movies for the rest of the semester. Yeah it is hard, but it is also a lot of fun.

I got some great experience arranging flowers on valentines weekend. And I discovered the beauty of calle lilies.

Aren't they beautiful?

It's okay if you fool everyone

Things I have learned over the past week:

1. Life is a lot easier if you pass classes the first time you take them

2. I am clingy and needy. I am fine with this but I guess some people are not...

3. I become VERY attached VERY easily. BIG problem.

4. Fake it 'til you make it - words to live by, especially when arranging flowers for v-day

5. Just working and NOT going to school will be blessed

6. I still dislike working at 4 am

My head is going to explode

Work at 4 am in not my favorite. I keep telling myself that it is only for one semester, trying to help myself get through, but then I remember that as long as I work in the NOC, regardless of the semester, I will always have at least one 4 am shift. ALWAYS. and during the summer I will probably have three 4 am shifts. All I can do it keep breathing.

ImagineCup

Hey everyone! I have the amazing opportunity of competing in a video competition in Poland, but I need some help! Just go to the site below, watch at least 2 minutes of the film I produced with my friend Jonny, and then like/vote for the video! Then pass it on to all your friends! The more votes we get the better chance we have of going to Poland! Thanks everyone!


Global Relationships start with the Family

January, FEBRUARY, March, April, May, I'm alive

FEBRUARY FIRST? when did this happen? I was not expecting this nor was a prepared. I hope all the other months in this semester fly by this fast. I would be more than okay with that.

I have been discussing my future with a lot of people recently and it scares me A LOT. I don't want to leave provo because it is comfortable, but I want to leave provo. All of my guy friends are finally coming home from missions and I feel like I will have friends here again so I don't want to go but I need to move on. Graduating will suck, this is what I have decided.

I am also trying to find a place to live for next year. Victoria Place has been very good to me but I am ready for a change. Hopefully this will be my last move before I graduate. Crazy. How did I get so old?

For now I think I will go sew some more and completely forget about my future. Who even likes the future?

Also if anyone knows of a good sewing pattern for jeans, please let me know. I want to try it.